January 2010
If I haven't drunk-dialed you tonight? I don't...
TIPSY.
That’s the word.
I'm a pumpkin?
2 tags
Sweet Jesus on a stick.
Do I have to explain that you don’t need to feel sorry for me? That I’m my own biggest fan and that your rule of thumb for when to take me seriously is never?
Star // Erasure
If I had to choose a...
You do NOT want me to do a decade in review.
It’s boring. Next it gets ugly. Then sordid. And more sordid. Which is all before it goes digital.
I used to have a gay boyfriend. Now I’m fending for myself with nothing but Erasure to keep me warm.
"Oatmeal, grits or cream of wheat?"
None of the above.
Eggs.
An orange.
Coffee. With real goddamn cream.
Perhaps a slice of toast. Whole wheat or nothing.
love-and-radiation:
...
Do they speak English in What?
December 2009
So help me, the radio station I'm listening to is...
How is that even possible?
Pinch me and tell me this isn’t 1989.
In a perfect world, I'd be designated kitchen...
Primary boo-boo-kisser. That too.
2 tags
I'm "drinking".
Why don't I have a wife?
They Might Be Giants kept Bean’s rapt attention for A WHOLE HOUR. So l told them they’re welcome to babysit anytime.
1 tag
Resolutions, the bare bones edition.
If all else fails, in 2010 I will worry, complain and procrastinate less, whilst hydrating, moisturizing and masturbating more.
Why am I shopping with the hegemonic bastards in...
Dear Barnes & Noble,
Why in the holy heck did I just buy a “membership” if on your website you’re offering members-only prices to everyone?
Hegemonic bastards.
I don't make resolutions.
monkeyfrog:
I never have, because I don’t keep them. I don’t stick to diets, homes, husbands, hairstyles, or anything else. My main consistency is my inconsistency.
But.
I am making one this year. I’m making it out loud, because I have got to keep it or it’s gonna kill me. As melodramatic as it sounds, it is straight up true. I know I can count on you all to help me.
2010 is the year I am...
1 tag
Last but not least, I resolve to temper my...
Resolutions, briefly.
I resolve to let go of negative feelings, situations and people. This includes my own sense of regret, circumstances I simply cannot improve more than I already have and people who, although they, like everyone, possess some good qualities, are emotional vampires who will suck me dry, but only if I let them.
I resolve to remain a former smoker, and also to eat better and exercise more, because I...
I just woke up.
It’s almost nine and Bean is still fast asleep. This is highly unusual. I’m also going to take it as a sign that tonight and the entire next year are going to be WONDERFUL.
A few weeks ago we had a conversation about how our children, as adults, will feel about our Tumblrs. I was thinking about that again earlier, when I realized Bean might grow up and find all of this horribly quaint. I believe that’s likely.
You guys are posting a lot of awesome notes tonight. I haven’t even gone back more than a few pages, so I’ve probably missed some....
Earlier today without preamble, blah blah blah, my...
I really just didn’t know what to say. Other than “thank you”.
2 tags
Higher Ground // RHCP
Taste the Pain // RHCP
To you girls and guys worried about San Fran
frageelaytwit:
Repeat after me: nobody cares that you think you’re fat. Nobody will care if you are, like me, actually fat. The Chicago(ish) Tweetup has not dissolved because its organizer is fat. Nor have the friendships that have deepened as a result of our quarterly shenanigans. On the off chance that anyone does care about your appearance, they can get bent and aren’t worthy of your...
Red wine really needs to stop pretending it's not...
I've missed a few years of pop culture so the "new...
I have a lot of catching up to do.
Tonight I’m seeing The Hangover. And/or one of the Pixar things I missed.
There are way too many varieties of wine in this store. I miss Grenada. Three flavors and done. Less responsibility.
I have two and half friends who I actually like...
I know, I can’t believe it either.
He just threatened to steal my “f” key. You know, because I’m typing? BRB.
I was going to post a photo of my new haircut....